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Wednesday, March 26, 2003
Be comfortable with uncertainty… Be comfortable with uncertainty… Be comfortable with uncertainty… I’ve been repeating this to myself almost as a mantra. Since becoming so enthralled by Pema’s book and being forced to focus my awareness internally, I’ve realized that I am a slave to resolution. I feel at my absolute weakest and most vulnerable when anything is left unresolved or the least bit undefined. This is a problem because, sometimes, I’ll push so hard for resolution and clarity, that I encourage or bring on the negative outcome… all because I’m more comfortable with dealing with a negative outcome than I am dealing with uncertainty. Think about it… dealing with negative outcomes to situations is easy. Someone you’re interested in doesn’t want to pursue a romantic relationship with you? There is literally only one thing to do, get over it and move on. Contrast this with the infinite number of possibilities that are available in the face of ambiguousness (possibilities you can’t even wrap your head around because there are so many), and you can begin to see why it might appear easier to push for resolution (even if it turns out to be a negative one) than force yourself to be comfortable with ‘not knowing.’ But what appears easier is not ALWAYS best. So in my ‘self-development,’ I have realized that my rush for clarity and certainty gets in the way of enjoying the more ambiguous daily experiences. I have more ‘work’ to do…  | private feedback | |
Hey! I'm Shane... a proud gay progressive Democrat who has recently relocated to New York City from Ithaca, NY. As I am no longer in Ithaca, I haven't quite decided the fate of this blog. Drop me a line!
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