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Sunday, June 30, 2002
So this blog that I've been following... The Date Project... has come to an end. The guy found a girlfriend. How long was that? Like two, three weeks? LOL. The virtues of living in a real city I guess. *shrug* IMPORTANT PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT... don't forget the price of stamps goes up to $.37 starting tomorrow. *smile* go to the post office early to avoid the line for the 3 cent additional stamps. I recently bought a whole roll of $.34 stamps, so I'll be there. | private feedback | (0) public comments Well... it's almost 3 AM Sunday morning... I almost never blog over the weekend. (Why? A weird reason, because the screen resolution on my iBook is so low that all fonts look big and its a little overwhelming and daunting to type out anything of length when the words are so... well.... big! But I can't sleep, and I updated some new Keelinn pics. Check them out, she's such a cutie patootie. And I got Lori and I in one with her too! She loves to have her picture taken, and so she makes me show her the picture on the preview screen everytime I take one. "Let me see! Let me see it!" she screams everytime the flash goes off. Lori thinks she may never grow up knowing film. Isn't that an interesting thought? And it might be true. She's very into the instant gratification of digital cameras. Anyway... so at the end of the evening Thursday I had taken a bunch of pics... and she was climbing into the car to go home when I said to her, "I'll send you those pics over the computer Keelinn." And she looked right at me and said, "Ok, Shane. And go ahead and make a copy for yourself if you want." She was so serious... I started laughing so hard! I can't believe the things this four-year old says sometimes. So I'm sitting up watching CMT, a pasttime of mine. Is that how you spell pasttime? *grin* I'm really getting into a lot of the new female country artists right now. Martina McBride, Faith Hill, Shania (when is she going to have anything new out?), Lee Ann Womack, Chely Wright, Carolyn Dawn Johnson... and the occasional band or male singer... (I can only think of Emerson Drive at the moment). Oh yeah! And that song by Brad Paisley, "I'm Gonna Miss Her" about a guy who chooses fishing over his girlfriend. What a trip! Let's see, I went to see Minority Report tonight with Jacques. I was pleasantly surprised with the movie, the story was really well-written, I didn't have to make too many mental leaps and there were a few twists in the plot I wasn't expecting. I think the worse thing about Hollywood movies is that they're so predictable. So I'm thrilled this one was less-than-average on the "predictability scale." (Aside to Mikey... definitely go see this movie, I dunno if I can see it again though." The other reason I hate to see big Hollywood movies though is because of the whole event of going to the mall to see a movie. I know I've complained about this before, so I'll make this brief... You pay $8.25 to see a movie, $2.50 if you want a SMALL drink (!?!?!?) and then they "invite" you to give money to the jimmy fund... then you sit through a coke commercial (a pretty lame one at that)... and then about ten previews to questionable movies. *eye roll* Rarely is there a mainstream movie worth this. Another thing I realized I didn't follow-up on is how I'm feelin'. My sinus/cold/flu/whatever-I-had is getting better seemingly. Right now I just have a constant stream of phlegm that is causing a bit of discomfort. But hopefully I'm back to 100% by Monday or I'll go to the doctor. Something funny I have come across a few late nights now... is this show on Oxygen called Sunday Night Sex Show... or something like that... with a very pleasant older woman hosting. I LOVE THIS SHOW. Tonight I learned that a typical ejaculate (she ALWAYS calls it ejaculate) has only 35 calories. She assures a caller that an ejaculate is "no more fattening than ONE bite of chocolate cake." LOL. Also, some boy called in asking about how his girlfriend can help him acheive an A-spot orgasm (who knew it had an official name when you stimulate the prostate)... and of course his first concern was if he told his girlfriend to do this, would she think he was... *gasp* GAY!? LOL. This show is highly entertaining. I recommend you watch it at least once. I think it's on at midnight and now that I am not going to have Politically Incorrect to watch at midnight I may have to program Oxygen into my "favorites." :-) Tomorrow is the "Pride" picnic at Common Ground. I went out this past Friday night ONLY because I was supposed to meet friends (who didn't end up showing). I was very disappointed as usual. But I think I will go to the picnic tomorrow, they are going to be tossing around ideas about how to start an Ithaca pride festival in 2003. It's about time. I think that's about it tonight... I'll probably be up a while watching t.v. Not really in the mood to go to bed yet... I wish I had a book. | private feedback | (0) public comments Friday, June 28, 2002 I am going to wake up every day happy that I am NOT a republican. From CNN.com: Republicans seize on Pledge decision. | private feedback | (0) public comments And the other big news story today. A federal appeals court judge ruled that the "Pledge of Allegiance" was unconstitutional because it contained the words "under god" and that it violated the separation of church and state as set forth in the constitution. I have to say I whole-heartedly agree with this decision and I hope that it is upheld. Attorney General John Ashcroft, in true political form, today said, "The Justice Department will defend the ability of our nation's children to pledge allegiance to the American flag." I actually agree with him... that children should have the ABILITY to pledge allegiance to the American flag... but it shouldn't be mandatory and it certainly shouldn't include the words "under god." Nobody is saying folks shouldn't have the right to pledge allegiance to our flag, they're just objecting to the use of "under god" in the pledge. And here's the shocker. There's a simple fix to this whole mess. Just change the "Pledge of Allegiance." Yes, that's right, CHANGE it. The current pledge is not the same as the original pledge. The author of the original pledge undoubtedly understood what separation of church and state meant. In fact, the pledge has gone through three drafts altogether, and the words "under god" were added in 1954! So this whole "under god" thing is a relatively recent (and unnecessary) phenomenon. Read the story on CNN.com"Government to ask rehearing of Pledge ruling" | private feedback | (0) public comments I'm reading along in the Ithaca Journal today, and there is a cover story on how the New York State pension fund has taken a large hit (approx. $300 million) in the aftermath of the WorldCom scandal. H. Carl McCall pretty much single-handedly runs the pension fund and all of its investements. So, of course, Andrew Cuomo's Campaign Manager makes a statement saying, "This is yet another example of questionable investing by the Comptroller [McCall]" WHAT?!?! QUESTIONABLE!?! Shame on that pathetic man and his candidate who are running scared and will use anything to try and make their opponent look bad. Let's not forget the fact that WorldCom is a fraud! That's the *real* issue here. They didn't just fool McCall, they fooled everyone. On paper, WorldCom looked to be a huge moneymaker. They "cooked" the books. McCall was putting our money where it was supposed to be making the most return. Most every large investor, including the other largest pension funds in the country, invested in WorldCom! So all of the sudden it was a QUESTIONABLE investment?! As if McCall knew that they were committing fraud? Why not call it like it is, another unethical corporation thinking they can get away with anything. Let's leave it at that. And what Andrew Cuomo's campaign manager SHOULD have said is, "Let's protect New York, we lost a lot of money in this scandal. Investigate WorldCom to the fullest extent of the law and enact some real change in policy concerning accounting and the unethical practices of corporate america." Period. McCall is already looking into a lawsuit on behalf of New York. McCall is a superstar! It will be a sad day for the State of New York if Carl McCall is not our next Governor. Read the full story from the Ithaca Journal about the WorldCom/NY connection And, as if we didn't know already... but just to underline my point of what an arrogant slimeball Andrew Cuomo presents himself to be.... another quote from today's journal (in a different article) "McCall has said that he'll support Cuomo if he gains the nomination. Cuomo has avoided making a similar commitment, insisting he will win the primary." Enough said. | private feedback | (0) public comments Thursday, June 27, 2002 Michael Moore, author of STUPID WHITE MEN is going to be a guest on Politically Incorrect With Bill Maher -- TONIGHT! (12:05 EST, ABC) Two of my favorite folks in the same room... Don't miss it! This the final week of Politically Incorrect -- ABC has cancelled the show. :-( Also, both Bill Maher and Michael Moore have launched new Web sites recently. Check them out: Bill Maher's New Web Site Michael Moore's Updated Web Site (with all kinds of new features and content... including a new chapter to his bestselling book, which is still riding high on the New York Times book chart! AND, maybe the coolest thing of all, he has a blog now where he keeps a daily journal! GO BLOGGER!) | private feedback | (0) public comments Not really much to say about yesterday and last night. I spent the night watching lame television shows (there is *nothing* on t.v. on Wednesday nights) and attempting to take it easy hoping that I would begin to feel better. I guess it worked, this morning I don't have any of the pain I had yesterday, just the stuffed up sinuses. Even the runny nose has gotten better. Today, I won't have to keep the box of kleenex SO close at hand. ;-) Tonight I get to watch Keelinn and, depending on how I'm feeling afterwards, go see a softball game with Mike. WOOHOO! | private feedback | (0) public comments Wednesday, June 26, 2002 Technical difficulties... Seems that Blogger totally messed up my homepage template... so I had to completely re-do it and learn all of the Blogger code again. I took the opportunity move a few things around like put the update times as headers so you'll know exactly when the page was last. Let me know if there are other layout changes that would make my web journal easier to follow. :-) I'm also excited to say that if you're lookin' at my page in Internet Explorer and recent versions of Netscape (6.0 and later) that my links should change colors when you roll-over them. Hey, it's the little things in life that make me happy. *big cute grin* | private feedback | (0) public comments Tuesday, June 25, 2002 I hardly have it in me to type anything out about my trip to P-town. I'm pretty tired today and I've developed a sore throat. Ick. I'm coughing like a mad man today. I suppose I'll just start typing about my weekend and see where that gets me... First of all, I didn't take any pics the whole trip. Sorry, but I just got so carried away and wanted to enjoy my weekend without having a camera strapped to my neck the whole time. I think my memories will be vivid enough to last a while, at least until my next trip to P-town. The car ride there was 8 hours, a full hour less than a few other folks had told me. After a brief stop for beverages we were on the road shortly after 6 AM. We were supposed to meet Paul in P-town, but he had gotten stuck in traffic somwhere around NYC (I think), so we were about neck-and-neck coming to the cape and decided to meet him at a rest station shortly before crossing into the cape area of Mass. Rodney hopped in the car with him and Mike and I followed them up to Provincetown. I guess we got into Provincetown shortly after 2. The guest house was fantastic. The Commons had a restaurant, two bars, a beautiful garden area. Our room was on the third floor so you could look out over a few rows of houses to the bay. At one point this weekend we were close to a full moon and the moonlight lit up the boats in the harbor. I don't remember when I had seen anything so beautiful as that. We got dinner immediately at a cute little restaurant in town (Post Office Cafe) and then walked a little bit. But I was so exhausted that I ended up taking a nap right away. Traveling always kicks my butt. We had a few drinks at the bar, got another dinner (The Lobster Pot) and then later that night we went out to Atlantic House, one of the dance clubs in town. A-House has some potential, it has a few decks, a nice dance floor. It was decorated in boating stuff and had wood paneled walls and flooring. Paul said it was like being on "Gay Gilligan's Island." Imagine the hut on the island and you'll be picturing the A-House. And the music absolutely stank. The DJ never got it up fast enough that I would want to dance and even when he played a few good songs (Cher, etc.) the mixes absolutely knocked any energy out of the songs that was already there. It would have been better to play the album versions in my opinion. We nicknamed the place the A-hole and vowed never to come back. Rodney left very early and Paul and Mike and I followed suit not long after. The next day we walked around, got some breakfast, shopped and went on a whale watch with the Portuguese Princess Whale Watching Tour Company. It was a little over an hour to ride the boat to the Stellwagen Bank where apparently a lot of Marine Mammals feed. We saw a few whales, like 3 or 4 total, and the guide said there were two different kinds but they all looked the same to me. :-) It was Rodney's birthday on Saturday also, so we arranged to get a cake and eat at our guest house... We walked around shopping a bit and went to get some cash. On our walk back we checked out the "Size Queens" show at Steve's Alibi that I had seen advertised in the Provincetown gay magazines. Pearlina and another drag queen that I can't remember her name (sorry!) performed and they were really funny. Pearlina sang all her own songs and the other Drag Queen did impersonations of Michael Jackson, Cher, and Judy Garland. She sang a fierce "I Got You Babe" and even did Sunny's vocals using a little Sunny doll as a prop. I had a blast. Then Paul, Mike and I went to Paramount at The Crown and Anchor. From the minute we walked into this place good dance music was playing and it was such a simple layout, the whole place was dedicated to dancing. We loved it. We stayed until close (1 AM). They had an outside patio area but it was raining so that wasn't so much fun unless you were under the awning. I got a little buzzed. I remember it all, but apparently at one point I was throwing ice at people. :-) I also ran into an acquaintance that I had met at a friend's party in Ithaca out at Paramount so we got to chat a bit. Small world... well, not really, he lives in Boston and gets to go to Provincetown all the time. Heh. It was a shame we had to go home, it was pouring rain when we left so the three of us were sopping wet by the time we got to the other end of Commercial Street where our guest house was. Sunday Paul decided to leave Provincetown early. He said he didn't want to spend his whole week in a hotel room cause he was traveling later that week as well. Whatever the reason, he missed a great day. I got a nap in the early afternoon. Mike and Rodney and I had gotten to walk around the beach a little in the morning. And Mike and I went to see a movie while Rodney did some more shopping. I wasn't sure what to expect. I had seen a poster for this movie "Sordid Lives" with Delta Burke, Beau Bridges, and Olivia Newton-John. It was an absolute riot! Go see this movie if you can. I had never even heard of it before I got to Provincetown. Apparently the critics hated it but audiences really enjoy it. It has a lot of gay content... and it was well written. It's about a truly dysfunctional Texas family with a closeted gay son, a cheating husband who "kills" his mistress while they're having a rendez-vous, and a conversion-happy psychiatrist trying to change the cross-dressing uncle's lifestyle. VERY FUNNY! And Olivia Newton-John sings the theme song "It's a bitch... sorting out our sordid lives" LOL. Anyway... Mike and I were walking back from the movie and got accosted by four drag queens, The Kinsey Sicks, who wanted to entice us to come see their show. They didn't have to do much work, I had read about them in the Advocate and wanted to see their show. I was super excited they were in Provincetown. So we bought tickets... they are hilarious! If you ever have the chance to see them, do it! They sing parodies of popular songs... and they do it a-capella -- drag-apella. All the material is original. We hung out with them a few minutes after the show, Rodney and I bought a CD and then we ran into them (out of drag) at the A-Hole later that night. ;-) Now, I know we thought we'd never go back to the A-Hole, but the Paramount was closed on Sunday nights. We didn't have the energy to walk ALL the way to the other end of Commercial street where the other bars were (Boatslip and Pied Bar) and we didn't even know if they were open anyway. We were just hoping there was a different DJ playing Sunday nights. There wasn't, but the music was a LITTLE better. A few songs, good mixes of Anastacia. I ended up meeting this really nice guy named Neal who works in the same industry as me, but in Boston. We talked for quite a while. It was cool to meet someone new out and about. I think we must have left the bar around 12:30 ish and he took me on a walking tour of P-Town at night. Monday we got breakfast, did a bit of shopping, but we were out of the guest house by 11 AM. We got back on the road by noon. It seemed like a crazy long time to be on the road, but we had our Kinsey Sicks CD's to listen to and of course all of Mike's dance music... All in all I had a super time in P-Town and I can't wait to get back there! Oh I almost forgot about the coolest street performer in the world. I dunno what her real name is, but her stage name is "Buzzette" and she pretends to be a robot or mechanical person, however you want to refer to it. She keeps a reed in her mouth to make electronic buzzing noises and moves in a very jarring/stiff way. She interacts with the audience (I was in two of her shows.) Talking with her later, I was so envious of her, she travels around the world performing like this... all through Europe, all over the U.S. and we were lucky enough to have her in P-Town this weekend. Some photographers were there and they took a pic of her trying to kiss me... as part of her bit. I hope they send me the digital copies, I gave him my email address and they said they would. If so, those would be the only photos from our trip... Heh, this is long enough and I gotta catch up with things here at work.... More soon. :-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Thursday, June 20, 2002 My friend Mike is silly. I think that's why we get along so well. He's been havin' some issues gettin' his cell phone... I just went to his web page to catch up on the saga and he had written some pretty funny stuff in his last few journals. Check it out. As for me, I've spent the last day or so preparing mentally and physically for Provincetown! Come 6:00 am tomorrow morning, Rodney, Mike, and I will pile into a car and depart for what will seem like an eternity of driving. I am going to take my digital camera and my laptop in the hopes of capturing as much of this trip as I can. But I make no promises. I took two roles of pictures at the Toronto Pride Fest last year and STILL haven't gotten them developed. I took my camera to Chicago and didn't take one single picture while I was there. Back in touch with y'all sometime Tuesday! Check out some sites dedicated to Provincetown, Mass.: GayProvincetown.com Provincetown.com The Gay and Lesbian Guide to Provincetown GayProvincetown.Net | private feedback | (0) public comments A piece of interesting NY history... from Politicsny.com 129 years ago this week... Susan B. Anthony found guilty of voting in 1872 presidential election On June 18, 1873, Rochester's Susan B. Anthony was convicted of illegally voting in the 1872 presidential election in the Ontario County Courthouse in Canandaigua. Rochester Democrat and Chronicle columnist Mark Hare writes today that the trial set in motion the "tectonic plates of history," which led 47 years later to the enactment of the 20th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, that provided women the right to vote. Anthony's trial, which was presided over by U.S. Supreme Court Justice Ward Hunt, was moved from Rochester to Canandaigua because prosecutors feared she had too much support in the city to be convicted. Hare writes that Anthony believed she already had the right to vote under the 14th Amendment, that says all "persons born or naturalized" in this country are citizens and that no state shall "abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens." But that point of law was never considered. Instead, Anthony was charged under a reconstruction-era law making it illegal for those who know they have no right to vote to do so. Hare reports that for most observers – even in 1873 – the trial was a travesty. Justice Hunt ruled Anthony – by virtue of her sex – “incompetent” to testify, although she was allowed to testify one day later at the trial of the inspectors who faced charges for permitting her to vote. Hunt directed the jury to find her guilty, even though many said they would have voted for her acquittal if permitted to do so. Hares reports that Anthony's place in Canandaigua history is marked by a bust that rests on a shelf in the tiny foyer outside the North Courtroom of the Ontario County Courthouse on Main Street. A metal plate attached to its base gives her name and says, "Justice denied here 1873." | private feedback | (0) public comments Wednesday, June 19, 2002 I know I put this link up recently in one of my blogs, but here it is again. I'm getting more and more interested in The Date Project as the days go on. It's really interesting to read a straight guy's own words on his mission to find a girlfriend. Today, his post centered around whether or not he should even tell the girls that he's dating about the Web site. (If he tells them, he loses his anonymous way to talk about his experiences because they can sort of follow along with the rest of us -- and if he doesn't tell them, they might get pissed later on to find out that their whole dating experience has been dissected on the web and wonder if they were just an experiment.) This is sort of the same reason I tend not to mention any of my dating experiences here, because Ithaca is way too small a place and I don't want anyone who I went out with to be able to go to my Web site to find out what I thought of them... if that makes sense. (And, P.S., this *is* Ithaca, so I don't get the opportunity to go on that many dates to begin with...) | private feedback | (0) public comments So last night after doin' laundry, Mike and I went to see Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood at Pyramid Mall. I was so excited to see this movie, even though I knew it couldn't hold a candle to the book. I can't imagine how anyone who hadn't read the book could even follow this movie. Besides the names of the characters and a few flashbacks, the story was very different from the book. Whole parts that I think were integral to understanding the emotional depth of the main characters were left out and some of the characters' essence was totally re-written. Vivi Walker lost all of her sarcastic bite at the end of the movie, which is VERY unlike the book and VERY tragic. Sandra Bullock is just... well... Sandra Bullock. There's not much you can say for her. I have a hard time understanding how any author can pour their heart and soul into a book and then sign-off on a Hollywood adaptation that is not in the same realm of quality. My STRONG recommendation is to skip the movie and read the book. You won't be sorry. But there were some previews for other movies that look good... movies that were based on novels. So perhaps my reading list this summer will get a bit longer. | private feedback | (0) public comments Tuesday, June 18, 2002 Hey, I almost forgot... Mike and I have tentative plans to go see Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood tonight. I cannot wait! I'm trying not to get my hopes up, I haven't heard many good things about it... but I just have to see how Hollywood interprets these characters and brings them to life... | private feedback | (0) public comments AWWWW, so I ran into my good friend Ann on the Commons on my way back from lunch today. We got to catch up... she gave me a big hug... and then waiting on my desk for me back at the office was a bottle of champagne from Gion-Men and Jennifer (My boss and his wife) for my birthday last week and a little note thanking me for all the "great things" I do. That helped put things back in perspective. | private feedback | (0) public comments I think I let some things bother me too much. I'm not talking about credit-card-stealing-asshole guy... but, well... I'll tell you this and then you can tell me if you think I'm full of shit or not. (Wow, my potty mouth is in hyper-drive the last 24 hours.) When I'm bored and passing time sometimes I get on Gay.com chat. I generally just chat, especially if I'm at work. I can let the chat go in the background and do my work at the same time. I have friends who chat on there and sometimes they private me to make arrangements to do something, or what have you... and once in my life I have actually met a decent person on Gay.com. So I do hold out hope that might happen again. So Gay.com just announced this new service which is a video chat. They're promoting it by sending out messages into the chat rooms. And they're always the same... "Join Peter, Jack and *insert some other sexually suggestive name for a penis here that I can't remember* in the Gay.com video chat." Am I wrong to have a problem with that? That the only way Gay.com thinks they are going to get people to use the Gay.com video chat is by using thinly veiled (ok, blatant) sexual innuendo... as if that's the only thing that will appeal to gay men. I dunno, if they had a bunch of different promotions all running then I would say, "OK, they're appealing to a particular segment with that and there are other ones that appeal to other people." But I've never seen any other ones... I just have a problem being lumped in with a bunch of people whose penis drives 95% of their decisions. *sigh* Ok, I've vented, off to lunch! | private feedback | (0) public comments Monday, June 17, 2002 I'm back on my Mountain Dew Code Red kick today... they didn't have any Vanilla Coke at the Commons Market. :-( Bummer. Other than that not much is new but I wanted to post SOMETHING this afternoon. :-) I have been getting a lot of feedback on my site lately and I wanted to thank y'all for writing me. I really love getting those feedback notes... It is keeping me motivated to post information and pictures and such. I found a funny site today, RateMyKitten.com, linked off another blog page. Apparently, its a take-off of HotorNot.com except you rate cats instead of people. What will they think of next? (In all fairness, I have to say that the kitten pics ARE pretty cute. :-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Monday morning again. My weekends just keep gettin' better and better and it keeps gettin' so much harder to go back to the office. Let's see if I can remember any of the details of this weekend. Friday night my first order of business was to finish DIVINE SECRETS. It didn't take long since I had only 25 pages left. What a fantastic book! Of course, like any great book, when I finished it there was a little hole in my being where those characters had dwelt for a week. Its such an intense feeling to get to know, so intimately, a group of characters in such a short span of time. As a reader you have access to priviledged information that others (even pivotal characters in the book) don't know. Anyway, on Sunday I bought a copy of LITTLE ALTARS EVERYWHERE, also by Rebecca Wells, because it's a bunch of short stories told by the characters in DIVINE SECRETS. Although, chronologically, LITTLE ALTARS EVERYWHERE was written first and planted the seeds for what would become DIVINE SECRETS. (P.S. If anyone I know wants to borrow DIVINE SECRETS, just let me know. ;-) After napping a bit, my friend Kerry came down to go to the Common Ground with me. I made an exception to go out because it was my "birthday weekend." Surprisingly enough, I actually had a great time out. I think mostly because it was alot of new faces, and because Mike was playing some fab music! Go Mikey! (A few gin and tonics didn't hurt either). Earlier in the week, Mike had sent me an MP3 of Erin Hamilton's "I've Got The Music In Me." If you haven't heard this song, find it! Its fierce! I can't get it out of my head... I was wandering around the mall Saturday singing it. *grin* Saturday we planned to go to the Syracuse Pride Festival. That started out as fun too. Intermittent rain kept us under the tents mostly, but the sun came out for the parade. There were anti-gay protesters along the parade route of course. They never miss an opportunity to be nasty and vile. Why do they feel they have the right to come to our events and scream into bullhorns at us? I don't go to their churches and heckle the priests on Sundays. I have better things to do. Don't they? Its sort of sad really. By late afternoon it was still raining, so we decided to go to the Mall and walk around. At least it would be a little warmer there. Did a little shopping, bought two shirts, (GAP and H&M). Then on to RAIN where we would spend the rest of the night playing pool, playing darts, and hanging out. We must have left about 1:30 ish. Sunday I got up and watched Meet The Press, and then went to Juna's to get breakfast... and read a little of LITTLE ALTARS EVERYWHERE. I made sure I was home by 2, cause Lori was comin' to pick me up. I spent the afternoon with her and Darlene and Keelinn. We watched Harry Potter (pretty good, what I saw of it... between Keelinn talking through it and dancing around in front of the T.V.) and then it was time for me to get home. When I got home, John had left a message on my machine to maybe catch a movie. Josh, his boyfriend was out of town so he wanted something to do. We ended up seeing "About a Boy" with Hugh Grant at the Mall. It was a super cute movie... And I cannot get over how good Hugh Grant looks. ;-) I'm starting to appreciate guys who are more mature, and sophisticated. And he had these little wrinkles around his eyes that were so cute when he smiled... Ok, I'm starting to scare myself. Its Monday morning and time for me to get to work... | private feedback | (0) public comments Friday, June 14, 2002 One of the few blogs I've seen that I felt compelled to share. This guy is going to recount his daily efforts to find a girlfriend in the pacific northwest. He calls his site "The Date Project." I think I sorta relate to his mission. ;-) | private feedback | (0) public comments For the last two years I have given myself some pretty unconventional birthday gifts. Last year, I was unhappy in the relationship I was in and so I broke up with the guy I was seeing... My birthday present to myself was independence from the negative energy that relationship had become. This year... I gave myself something sort of along the same lines. I needed to get some stuff off my chest that's been bothering me for years. I have always had a strained relationship with my father. And its gotten to the point that he and I only talk on the holidays, and when someone dies. Fine. I had gotten used to this... but the fake pleasantries still bothered me. He would invite me down to visit and I would make up an excuse... and the dance continued. Through adulthood my father has completely turned his back on me. He's a born salesman and will say anything, ANYTHING, to close the deal. Every conversation is an opportunity to make himself look good. When I came out to him and he had an opportunity to say, "Good for you Shane. You've Finally found your place in the world." He said instead, "I'm OK with it. And you're lucky that I'm OK with it. I bet most other guy's parents wouldn't be so accepting when they came out." Its always ALL ABOUT HIM. The stories go on and on... from gifts that he lied to me about... to graduations he never attended... to outright deceit... to times when I've asked to BORROW a few hundred dollars only to have him say no he didn't have the money (a few months later his house was filled with expensive electronics and kitchen appliances that he bragged on and on about). Ask any of my friends, this is the tip of the iceberg. So, of course, the sum effect of this is that I don't talk to him like I should. WE don't talk like we should. This all culminated in him not calling me for my birthday because I didn't get around to calling him. So I said to myself, "Shane, this is ridiculous. Do something to keep this relationship on track." I called him last night. And I laid it all on the line. I wasn't confrontational, I wasn't angry. I just said, "This is what I've seen and this is why I'm frustrated." He went on the defensive immediately. He started calling me all kinds of names. He was making excuses. He kept saying over and over again, "Are you calling me a liar!?" At one point he said, "Do you want money, is that what this is about?" (This was the point at which I got the closest to being angry, because I have NEVER asked him for anything and certainly wouldn't use this tactic. He OBVIOUSLY doesn't know me.) At multiple points in the conversation he said, "Well, maybe this conversation needed to happen so that we could finally say our relationship is over." *I* never said anything of the sort, I wasn't pushing in that direction. I honestly thought he might be a reasonable individual and we'd talk it out. Things would improve over time... I apologized profusely for not calling him on his birthday. Over and over. Telling him I didn't mean to hurt his feelings, that I wasn't trying to be spiteful. I said "Happy Birthday" a million times. Do you think he once said, "Happy birthday" to me? Do you think he said, "I'm sorry I didn't call YOU on your birthday, too"? Nope. I was in the middle of a sentence telling him how glad I was that he'd taken the time to listen... how much I appreciated that. He interrupted me to say, "Well I guess we'll see if things get better." And he hung up on me. Blunt -- just like that. God help this man who I poured my feelings out to and he hung up on me. That was the last straw for me. I made a very difficult phone call yesterday to tell him all my feelings and frustrations... and if he doesn't call me to apologize for the way he acted I will NEVER pick up the phone and call him again. He's never been there for me. I know he never WILL be there for me. He's proven it time and time again. I know that he's waiting for me to call him on Father's Day and that will be proof that *I'm* making an effort. He's going to be sadly mistaken when he goes to bed Sunday night and I haven't called... | private feedback | (0) public comments Thursday, June 13, 2002 I'm looking forward to this weekend... going to the Syracuse Pride Festival and Parade with Mikey and Rodney. Some friends who have a band (Blue Water Day) are playing at Spirits Friday night... and then they have a float in the parade. Go see them if you can! This will probably be the only official "pride" celebration I go to unless I make it up to Rotten-chester in July. So I wanna enjoy it for all its worth. Well... every weekend in Provincetown is pride right? Heh. I'm goin' to P-town NEXT weekend. Woohoo! | private feedback | (0) public comments What a perfect day yesterday. Keelinn sang me happy birthday on my answering machine... The accountant at our office got me a cake... Cheri invited me to lunch... I got a bunch of phone calls and emails during the day... I hung out on the commons reading a few hours after work... 8 of us got together for drinks and dessert at Madeline's... (It was so great to just sit in the presence of all my friends for a while. They all made my night! Thanks MIKE, DAVE, RODNEY, JAMIE, JULIE, TRINA, and CHERI.) I got home and my friend Brett had sang happy birthday on my answering machine. Heh. Gotta love that. Sometimes I don't feel like I deserve these folks. | private feedback | (0) public comments Wednesday, June 12, 2002 A moment for a political opinion... the most recent "attack" on H. Carl McCall... from a Newsday article and politicsny.com... -- "Giambra (an erie county executive and Democrat turned Republican) complained that as sole trustee of the state's more than $100 billion public employee pension fund, Democrat McCall had invested only about 6 percent of it in New York state while his Republican predecessor Edward Regan had about 10 percent of the fund invested in New York state. McCall wasn't immediately able to say how much of the pension fund he manages is invested in New York state."-- Ok... now me... Who cares where H. Carl McCall invests our money as long as he gets the best return on his investment? He's trying to get the best possible return so that we can take care of New York state public employees and they can confidently receive pensions. OK, OK, so some of you are saying, "Well, but he should still invest New York money within the state of New York! It could help stimulate the local economy, right?" Maybe, but don't you think it speaks volumes that the companies that are making the money and worth investing in are OUTSIDE the state of New York? Don't you think that if the best investments were in New York that McCall would put the money there? I think this speaks more about Pataki's LACK of economic development initiatives in his eight years than any faults of McCall, who is simply looking out for New York state public employees and keeping their pension fund in the black. Just my two cents. | private feedback | (0) public comments I got out of the shower this morning just in time to hear a 4-year old singing happy birthday on my answering machine. *smile* I got a few emails and a couple of phone calls already... I LOVE birthdays... OK, I love MY birthday... (I never seem to remember anyone else's.) :-P Tonight a bunch of friends and I are getting together for drinks/dessert at Madeline's... that will be the perfect way to spend a few hours this evening... Last night I went to cheer on my girls at their softball game. They're the Viva/Greenstar/Curves team, and they won 10-8! Woohoo! I also went to see MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING at Cinemapolis. It was really cute... and John Corbett (of Sex and The City fame) is a really good actor. (Though I prefer him in short hair.) All of the supporting characters in the movie were great... do you remember CeCe's mother in Beaches? Well, she played the bride's mother in this movie. And the father was hysterical. Whenever the movie needed a little comic relief he'd be spraying Windex on someone... you'll have to watch the movie to figure out why. LOL. I definitely recommend seeing MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING. I'm still in the middle of "Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood." And I'm still loving it. (I dunno if I've already said this or not... but the book is about a daughter digging through her mother's scrapbook and finding little news clippings, letters and photos, each that tell a little story about her mother... who is a little nutty and she's never completely understood.) I talked with my mom last night who saw the movie recently and said it was "a few good parts with alot of dull, dead space around them." So maybe I skip the movie? But I love the actresses in it, so I may go just to see them. I can't imagine the movie being anywhere near as good as this book. | private feedback | (0) public comments Tuesday, June 11, 2002 WOOHOO!! I crossed the 13,000 "site hits" milestone yesterday. Thanks Y'all. ;-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Well... my accountant remembered that it was my birthday tomorrow. I saw her this morning and she bought me a bagel to celebrate. ;-) (Yes... this *is* the accountant that gave me the gift of porn not too long ago.) | private feedback | (0) public comments Last night I saw HOLLYWOOD ENDING by Woody Allen at Fall Creek Pictures. As much as I wanted to like it... I left the theater and the best I could say about it was, "Well, it was OK." I couldn't suspend reality long enough to believe that Debra Messing OR Tea Leoni would be romantically interested in Woody Allen. The chemistry was...mmmm... non-existant. Woody is super neurotic which SOMETIMES tips the scale towards charming and funny, but only a few times. A couple of chuckles, but no real laughs. And of course Fall Creek Cinema is always a trip. The film was shown in theater #3, which is about the size of my living room with awkwardly placed seats which are at most 10 feet from the screen... and throw pillows scattered throughout the theater as if THAT will help make things comfortable. If you don't get to the theater a half-hour early you can count on the all the middle seating being taken (there are only 4 or 5 rows) and having to sit on the fringe of the theater having to look almost straight up and to the side. Oh well, I suppose that's what they call the "charm" of these small, independent theaters. Though, this is the FIRST movie I've gone to at the independent theaters in Ithaca that DIDN'T have film/sound trouble. Bravo. ;-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Monday, June 10, 2002 MY WEEKEND, PART II Sunday morning I got up around 10 to watch Meet the Press like I normally do every Sunday morning. It was pre-emtped by US Open tennis. Uninterested in who was winning the games, I got myself together and went to have a bagel and coffee at Juna's. I sat inside cause it was much easier than trying to find a clean seat out by the fountain. (P.S. someond had seriously vandalized our little fountain at some point this weekend and broke the upper basin right off the stand so that the water was pouring out from underneath... it was trés sad). I walked around a bit and got a book... DIVINE SECRETS OF THE YA YA SISTERHOOD. I have seen the trailer for the movie and it looks really good. If I see a preview for a movie that I'm really excited about -- and the movie was based on a book -- I tend to buy the book first. Books are ALWAYS better. (The only other two examples I can think of off the top of my head are THE STAND by Stephen King and A TIME TO KILL by John Grisham, both of which I sought out as books after seeing riveting movie previews. And they are among my favorite books to this day.) So I was sitting on the commons reading my new book and I thought it would be nice to walk to Ithaca Falls since I hadn't been there a while. I got a few blocks towards the falls and though on a whim I would call Josh to see if wanted to walk with me. I hadn't gotten to spend time with him in months... and luckily he was just sitting home bored. So we walked to the falls. Tons of water was rushing over them, folks were swimming... and there was a wedding going on. It was the neatest thing to see a wedding at the Ithaca falls. They were using the thin trail as the aisle for the bridal walk, there were flower girls, and the family and witnesses were standing on a rock-ledge above the bride and groom... Josh and I pulled sat on the rocks and watched. We couldn't hear a thing, but it was super cool. We ended up talking for a few hours, and going to shortstop and getting a sub and some ice cream. I really miss hanging out with Josh... we got to relive the memories of our great summer last year... and promised we'd have another great summer this year. I guess only time will tell. It was interesting to hear him talk about what memories stood out for him (how he felt after our first "disagreement") and what memories stood out for me (going to six-mile-creek with him the first time). Somewhere during the day Jacques called me asking if I wanted to go have dinner with him. We decided on Coyote Loco... After hanging out with Josh I got a quick nap... and woke up just in time to hear Jacques beeping his horn outside my apartment (he was early). Dinner was pretty ok, I haven't been to Coyote Loco in a while... I had a chicken enchilada (are they supposed to be so soggy?). And I had to share a margarita with Jacques, he was gettin' a little buzzed... We had to cut our evening short 'cause I had some work to do when I got home... the work took about an hour and then I spent the last forty-five minutes before bed reading more of DIVINE SECRETS. It's such a GOOD BOOK! It's going to be lunchtime soon... I'm going to get some work done. :-) More later... | private feedback | (0) public comments MY WEEKEND, PART I (Just cause I know I won't make it through the whole thing before my 11 o'clock meeting.) Friday night Mike, Rodney and I went to Prism in Binghamton. I was totally in the mood to dance and (as usual) NOT in the mood to go out to Common Ground. We got there around 10:30 and it was pretty dead... it never really picked up. I guess Friday is normally pretty quiet at Prism. But I still had a good time because it was a change of pace. The only reason I was a little disappointed is beause I had called my friend Denise to meet us out and she didn't show. Maybe she was out of town or something. I didn't actually get to talk to her, only left a few messages. Saturday morning I got up and got some food on the commons. I met Mikey out a little bit later, he got some food and then we decided to go hang out at the six-mile creek gorge to get some sun. The water was pretty nasty so I didn't dare touch it, but the sun was so intense, I got a little red.. Mike said my face looked a little darker. I'm determined to get and KEEP some color this summer. :-) So we were probably out there for a little over an hour-and-a-half and then I asked him if we could go to the Mall. Jacques had called earlier and asked if I wanted to go out to Syracuse.. but I didn't have anything to wear so I wanted to check out GAP and see if I could find a t-shirt to go with my favorite pair of blue jeans. :-P So, Mike and I went to the mall, checked out Borders... Dick's... Best Buy... and finally GAP. We got some ice cream (Denali Moose Tracks, mmmmm). I DID find a few things at GAP I like (a rarity lately) and then I had to go home and get a nap before Jacques came to get me at 8:30. Now, I wasn't super interested in going to Syracuse. If you remember, that's where the guy that hadn't called me all week spent his weekends, and I was SURE he was going to be out. He never misses a Friday or Saturday out at the clubs if he can help it. I was afraid of two things, one, that he would just ignore me and I'd feel like shit, and two, we'd talk and he'd make all kinds of lame excuses that would make me a little angry. But after my nap I felt much better and ready to take on the world. Jacques showed up a little late... but we arrived in Syracuse a little after 10. We spent the first half-hour talking to the bartender.. who convinced Jacques and I that we should take up tennis so that we could come to syracuse and play doubles with him and his (tennis) partner. (Apparently we're going to do that... after we've had the opportunity to practice a little.) Then Jacques and I played pool and darts... Finally, sometime later, HE arrives... He had bumped into Jacques who mentioned I was there, so he came up to me and started talking. Long story short... his excuse for not talking to me all week after our great weekend, and why, most importantly, he had no interest in pursuing anything... He said, "I'm really sorry. I got freaked out. All of your friends said, 'Don't screw him over.' and I got scared." He didn't seem super genuine and didn't want to tell me who said that. So I pretty much figured it was a line. Although it's a pretty good one I have to say... puts all the resonsibility on my friends, who, if they had just kept their mouth shut, wouldn't have freaked him out and we'd be just fine and dandy right now. *laughs* Anyway... so after that he sort of excused himself to go say hi to a friend he just saw come in and promised he'd come back and talk a bit more... and of course never did. In fact he left the bar before Jacques and I without even saying goodbye. Super. Oh yes, and I can't forget the other funny thing that happened. I asked Jacques if he would play pool with me. Well, apparently this other guy (we'll call him "T") had quarters on the table and was just waiting for someone to play with. But I thought the pool table was empty so Jacques and I went up to play together and he got in our faces. We finally convinced him to play doubles with us if he could find a partner. Within a few shots (I was being a little overzealous) I almost hit the 8 ball in. Out of some weird reflex, I put my hand in the pocket to stop the 8 ball from going in, and I did accidentally touch the 8 ball. It probably wouldn't have gone in, but I know how competitive queens are with their pool and so that was completely forbidden. He immediately said, "What the fuck are you trying to do? Cheat?" And I said, "I don't think it would have gone in, but if you wanna call the game, that's cool with me." I was completely apologetic, but for some reason, he got super pissy and said, "No, I'm going to win this game the fair way, even though I'm playing against a fucking loser." Of course *I* apparently was the loser. Now at this point I was on the brink of flipping out on him cause he was totally being unreasonable. I was trying to be the better person and not let it get to me, but he kept making comments about what a loser I was and I turned to his partner (who was an acquaintance of mine) and said, "How can you be friends with such an asshole?" (There is a little back-story that's sort of important. I have never had a good impression of "T." He is so ego-centric and stuck on himself that he can barely drag himself away from the mirrors long enough to actually make a shot on the table. He LOVED looking at himself and thought that everyone wanted him. He made this very plain, and I have no patience for that kind of stuff. So... back to our little story...) "T" was taking a shot and heard that I said SOMETHING to his friend and asked me what I said. I looked him right in the eyes and said, "I called you an asshole." To which he responded, "An asshole, that you'll never have." Of course I tried my best to tell him that he wasn't a piece of ass that I would want, considering he was nasty and more feminine than I liked... he didn't take too kindly to that and it all culminated in him saying something to the effect of, "Well, hot pieces of ass like me don't sleep with short, dorky, ugly guys like you." (Thank god I don't base my self-esteem on the opinions of clearly egotistical and superficial guys at gay bars, or else I'd probably be a mess. LOL.) I could see this conversation wasn't going anywhere, so when Jacques handed me the pool cue I handed it back to him and said I wasn't going to play with this asshole. If he wanted to, then fine. I think Jacques ended up winning, but I'm not sure. I was clear on the other side of the bar. I can't believe there are people in this world who can go from zero to petty in 5 seconds... I have to be thorougly provoked to do so... and I was... Well, that was pretty much my Saturday night in a nutshell... but since I didn't let the B.S get to me... in retrospect I had a great night. I had run into a few other folks that I knew as aquaintances and met a few nice guys. Jacques and I got back to Ithaca sometime around 3 AM. It's such a loooooong drive back to Ithaca at 1:30 in the morning. I went to bed right away and completely zonked out shortly after... I'll have to get to my Sunday after my 11 o'clock meeting... it was one of those weekends that felt like a week. :-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Ugh, I also gotta change my web header. Heh. I don't want two pics of me up on my homepage, I've just been too lazy to make a text-only navigation image... Hopefully this week sometime I'll get around to that... | private feedback | (0) public comments Lori and I send eachother fake news stories sometimes to dramatize insignificant events... just for the sake of making eachother chuckle. When she was living with me and I didn't see her for days at a time, I would send her news stories about the house... how some of her leftovers were sprouting legs and planning a mutiny in the refrigerator... or how Chrissy would sneak into the basement. Well, the tradition continues... Lori sent me this little snippit about Diva Girl, Keelinn's doll, Saturday morning... I was devastated at our near-loss. (This will have to keep you happy until I can find the time to type out my weekend... I have A LOT to say about it.) NEWS FLASH: DIVA GIRL HAS NARROW ESCAPE June 8, 2002 (Groton, NY) AP release: Diva Girl, of Groton, New York narrowly escaped a potentially fatal accident on friday night in the town of Groton. Her grandmother, Darlene was mowing the lawn and barely missed running over Diva Girl. "All I know, is I was walking along mowing, I looked down and saw something laying there. In a split second I decided to stop and I was shocked when I bent over to discover that it was Diva Girl," according to Darlene as she fought back tears. "I have no idea how she got there..." Diva Girl had been last seen enjoying a jump on the trampoline with Keelinn, also of Groton, NY on friday night. Keelinn is also the granddaughter of Darlene and cares for Diva Girl during the week when she lives with her grandmother. Also seen jumping on the trampoline on friday night was Diva Girls namesake Diva Shane, uncle of Keelinn. He was not available for comment at the time of this report. However, it was reported by a close family friend that Diva Shane was shocked by the accident and prays that she is better cared for in the future. He denies any responsibility for the near miss. It appears that Diva Girl had fallen from the trampoline sometime on friday night. She was found by Ms. Desmond just a few inches from the trampoline. Further investigation is pending by Groton Police Department. Information will be forthcoming. | private feedback | (0) public comments Friday, June 07, 2002 Politicsny.com rates H. CARL McCALL a "Strong Buy." -- In their own words... "After months of lagging in the polls, McCall pulled even with Andrew Cuomo in a NY1 poll released this week. After weeks of solid campaign progress, the state comptroller is now beginning to see the results of his forward progress in independent polling. Momentum continues to build for McCall’s potentially history-making campaign." | private feedback | (0) public comments I am soooooo exhausted today. Last night Lori picked me up after work to go get Keelinn from school. We went directly to Groton where Keelinn had me jumping on her new trampoline for what seemed like hours. We were finally able to coax her off the trampoline with a hot dog (we convinced her she had to eat to keep her energy up). I never knew what great exercise jumping on a trampoline is. Although jumping with a four-year old is a little different 'cause you gotta be super cautious... one wrong jump and she goes flying over the edge. I wish I had my camera, I don't know why I never bring it when I'm hanging out with Keelinn, it should be a given. After dinner she begged me to climb on the trampoline with her again but I told her my stomach needed to settle. She looked at me and said, "That's ok. I'm going to jump on the trampoline... with diva girl." I started laughing hysterically. Diva girl is the doll she got in her last burger king kid's meal. :-) That poor doll didn't know what was coming... Then, we watched Keelinn's dance recital tape. Of course Keelinn HAD to put on her dance dress so that I could see it... and her dance shoes. She did the steps alongside the video and even did all the steps with the "big girls." She's way too adorable. Then I got to go through the nightly book-reading ritual (Beauty and the Beast and The Hunchback of Notre Dame) and tucked her into bed. She had exhausted me so thoroughly I was OUT by 10:00. I didn't have the energy to stay up and watch Boston 24/7. The first face I saw this morning was Keelinn's... she came into my bedroom after her shower to wake me up. Heh. I can't think of a better way to start the day... Quote of the Week: Lori describing why noone can be described as "Bad" in their household. "There are no bad people. Only people who make poor choices." | private feedback | (0) public comments Thursday, June 06, 2002 JUST TOO FUNNY... You've gotta check out Dan Savage's column this week. In other news... I'm goin' to Groton tonight to hang out with Lori and my little cutie patootie princess Keelinn. Tentative plans are to watch the tape of Keelinn's dance recital, and jump on a trampoline for hours. (Not necessarily in that order.) WOOHOO! | private feedback | (0) public comments I can't even tell you how ecstatic I am right now... I just got the phone call that we DEFINITELY have this project that I presented yesterday... a pretty large media campaign. *phew* It was hinging on the opinion of the Marketing Director, and he loved almost everything we did! Now I have a reason to party... Heh. There's talk of a trip to Binghamton/Prism tomorrow. *fingers crossed* | private feedback | (0) public comments I don't know what's wrong with me the last couple of days, but I've been getting to work a half-hour early for no reason. Heh. If you know me, you know that I usually saunter in sometime shortly after nine on most days. And I'm not going to bed any earlier... I have been staying up until 12:30 every night to watch the last episodes of Politically Incorrect. I don't know when exactly it's going off the air but I'd like to keep watching the new episodes as long as I can. Speaking of television shows that I enjoy... Boston 24/7 is a new reality show on ABC. It follows all the important "players" (for lack of a better word) in Boston... the Mayor, the Press Secretary, the D.A, the Chief of Police, etc., etc. It's kinda cool. There's only been one episode so far, but I think it's on again tonight... check it out if you get the chance. (We all know how I love my reality shows... real life is way better than fiction.) I went to Common Ground last night with the intentions of playing in the dart tournament but I just couldn't stay in the mood once I got there. I used to really like the Common Ground, but I find it really depressing now. AND... they're jacking-up the price of everything -- sodas, food, and they even upped the price to play a game of darts. *eye roll* I love seeing all my friends but I think I'll just continue to see them in other venues. I'm sure I'll go out there for special events and a sunday barbeque or two, but in general that place is L-A-M-E. Every morning I HAVE to have music going while I'm in the shower. I pull out a random CD and play it, usually one I can sing to. *grin* I rediscovered an older Celine Dion album this morning... "Color Of Love"... or maybe "Power of Love?" Well anyway, it immediately brought back memories... one of bopping around campus as a sophomore to "Misled." I used to play that song on repeat all day. I STILL identify with it (maybe this morning more than ever). My favorite lines? "When I've been dissed, I don't spend much time on what might have been. -- I'm not about self-pity. Love did me wrong. Now I'm movin' on." And the other important song on that album for me was "I remember LA" which for some reason I associate with the first gay guy I was ever "with"... Hmmmm... I'm a little hesitant to share that story... It's very personal and a little tragic. But what the hell... it was years ago and another one of those things that made me who I am today. The first gay guy I ever met was when I was home during the summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college. I don't exactly know how I wound up in the GayRochester room on AOL chat, but there I was... and I started talking with this guy who was in Rochester from Utah on a business trip. After talking a bit, he convinced me to meet him. The first time we met, we went to dinner and a movie and then back to his place. Sparing the "filthy" details... we ended up getting together just about every other night for two-and-a-half weeks at the end of that summer. Sometimes we'd go to his place and sometimes go to mine. And its odd, because I remember not even caring if Mom came home and found us... in retrospect it all seems sort of surreal, but I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember all through high school I could NEVER be intimate with girls, but this just felt, for lack of a better term, right... with Steve. He wasn't "out" back in Utah... I remember him telling me all about his family and his work. I'm not sure I knew what "being out" meant at the time. For me, those two weeks were like an epiphany and I remember calling my best friend Harlie to tell her I was gay. I just HAD to tell someone. Everything finally clicked! And since that phone conversation I've never looked back. The story takes sort of a rotten turn at the end... like any newbie I was emotionally caught up in the whole affair... the last night Steve and I were together (he was going back to Utah and I to Cornell) -- I hugged him so tight and said, "So what am I gonna do without this when I get back to Ithaca?" He grabbed the crotch of my pants, looked directly into my eyes and said "Think with this and not your heart and you'll be OK." I was devastated. And that was it. So for some reason... I associate Celine's "I remember LA" with the last weeks of that summer... I guess you'll have to listen to the song now for the full effect. *deep sigh* OK, OK, that was a long enough trip down memory lane... | private feedback | (0) public comments Wednesday, June 05, 2002 My presentation this morning went very well. I presented concepts for an ad campaign (all on my lonesome, thank god)... and the client loved them! I'm going to be so happy if this project comes through. I've been working on the proposal and the media placement spreadsheet for weeks! We'll find out for sure tomorrow... | private feedback | (0) public comments You know, I've tried for a very long time to not write my relationship (or, more accurately, lack-of relationship) woes in my web journal... because I don't want to come across as whiney. I'm perfectly fine being in a state of singledom... (I don't NEED a bf -- but it would be nice, dont get me wrong). But I finally hit a breaking point. I think there is a definite trend of increasing deceitful-ness going around right now that I'm not super comfortable with. A little background, I've only REALLY liked three guys in the last year... One ended up telling me that he wasn't interested in any kind of a relationship he was just too "comfortable" being a bachelor. The second guy was an alcoholic. The third guy... well the jury's still out, but he hasn't called me for half-a-week when we had been talking EVERY DAY for the past two weeks (I'm beginning to put two and two together). Fine, that's all well-and-good. But don't LIE to me. The first guy (even recently) was sticking to his, "Yeah, you know. I'm so happy being single I don't want anything to do with a relationship and love. Blech!" story. So why does his new gay.com profile (he asked me to look at the new pic he posted last night) say "Looking for Love." GWM seeking decent guy... Blah, blah. So what is that supposed to make ME feel like? Grrrrrr. And the alcoholic? He avoids me like the plague until he has a boyfriend and then he's all about talking to me to brag that HE has a boyfriend... and... gee... I don't. And then he loses that boyfriend and he goes back to ignoring me. PETTY PETTY PETTY. Boys suck! | private feedback | (0) public comments Link to a site that gives you your YA-YA SISTERHOOD Name: (Thanks Mikey! You know I love this type of thing.) I'm "Duchess Weeping Willow," but if I put in my middle name, I'm "Countess Purrs Like a Kitten." THAT'S A KEEPER!! | private feedback | (0) public comments Tuesday, June 04, 2002 P.S. Yes Harlie dear, I'll get a link up to your new Web site ASAP. ;-) | private feedback | (0) public comments Sometimes life amuses me more than it should. Like 4 out of 5 days a week I have lunch at Paul's Cafe in Center Ithaca. The Lady who owns the place, Samira, knows my "usuals" now. I can generally just tell her I want a hamburger, or a sandwich and she knows EXACTLY how to make it. She's super sweet. Then there's the counter girl... Brenda. Also super sweet and for the longest time I couldn't figure out why she blushed every time I came to the counter. Well it seems that Samira has been trying to get her to ask me out on a date. LOL. Finally, Brenda confided in me that this was what was going on and I was like, "Well, I think you're super cute. But... I'm gay." She apparently told Samira, but the comments haven't stopped. I went to get a soda there today and the conversation went something like this: Samira: "Lunch today Shane?" Me: "No, just a drink, Samira" Samira: "You just can't stay away from Brenda." (I immediately start laughing and Brenda gets beet red.) Me (to Brenda): "Haven't you told her I'm gay yet?" Brenda: "Yes, a bunch of times, but she doesn't believe me. She says, 'No! He's not gay! He's perfect for you!'" Me (laughing): "One of these days I'll wear a big rainbow sticker and I'll tell her myself." Brenda: "She'll just say its a phase." Me (still laughing): She's worse than my mother. So, I blew Brenda a kiss as I was walking out of Center Ithaca today just to keep Samira going. *big cute grin* | private feedback | (0) public comments On my way home from work last night I stopped off at Shortstop for a sub and ran into a girl (Melissa) I haven't seen since Freshman year college. She was a hotel student but we lived together on the same floor of Donlon Hall. I totally recognized her and she gave me a huge hug... apparently she's back in Ithaca because she's dating someone in town and is finishing up classes at CU (she had left CU for health reasons in Sophomore year). She caught me up on her life and we exchanged numbers... she's really funny, so I hope we get to hang out soon. I was unaware that she had any conscious thoughts of me after Freshman year, but we apparently had a friend in common... actually an "ex" of mine. The way he came out to her was by saying "I have something I need to tell you." He put a picture of me in front of Melissa and said "THIS is my ex." To which she replied "You dated SHANE!?" And he said, "Yes, but you're missing my point, I'm trying to tell you I'm gay." She said, "I KNEW you were gay, but I didn't know you dated SHANE!" I just heard this story yesterday so I'm still laughing about it. Melissa also asked me about Harlie, another mutual friend of ours... so I called Harlie to tell her that I ran into Melissa. Harlie and I ended up talking on the phone for quite a while, our phone conversations always crack me up. We won't talk for months but when we talk its like no time has passed. In Harlie's words, "That's just us." I'm so lucky to have her friendship. Generally, when I'm feeling super frustrated about guys I'll call her and she just gets me laughing so hard I don't even think about it anymore. If you're reading this, Harlie... I miss you! | private feedback | (0) public comments Monday, June 03, 2002 Andrew Cuomo is really showing what a HYPOCRITE he is. He walks out of the Democratic Party Convention saying that he was a "people's candidate, not a party candidate" (really, he didn't want to face the all-too-real possibility of embarrassment by not getting the 25% he needs to get on the primary ballot) but then goes on to accept the nomination of the Liberal Party. So, apparently he is a party candidate, just not when he stands a chance of losing. Seems he'd rather high-tail and run than actually fight for anything. From McCall's weekly campaign email update: Hypocrisy #1: Cuomo Accepts Boss Controlled Liberal Party Nomination After Walking Out on Democrats Demonstrating the height of hypocrisy, Andrew Cuomo walked out and denounced the 1,500 grassroots representatives gathered last week at the Democratic convention only to walk into the smoke-filled room of patronage boss Ray Harding. It's the perfect match of the candidate who stands for nothing with a party that stands for nothing. Here's what some respected columnists are saying: * In the New York Times, Joyce Purnick wrote, "But how can he convince voters that he is a reformer when he rejects Democratic Party politics but plays Liberal Party politics?" * Also in the New York Times, Bob Herbert wrote, "even as Mr. Cuomo is sprinting away from the state Democratic Party, he's welcoming the endorsement of the Liberal Party, an increasingly disheveled organization that worships at the shrine of patronage and shudders at the mere mention of reform. Even Mr. Cuomo acknowledges that this might be problematic." * In Newsday, Sheryl McCarthy wrote, "There's an unctuousness to Andrew Cuomo that I find off-putting. Since the days when he worked for his father, Gov. Mario Cuomo, and ran his own housing program, I've had the impression that young Andrew was always running for something…He got even more attention last week when he boycotted the state Democratic Party convention, announcing that he'd conduct a petition drive to get on the primary ballot. Cuomo faced embarrassment at the convention, which overwhelmingly supported his Democratic rival, H. Carl McCall." | private feedback | (0) public comments Super weekend! The weather was beautiful and it felt like I was always "on-the-go"... Friday evening, Matt came down from Syracuse and we went to dinner (Viva Cantina) and then walked around the Ithaca Festival a bit. We ended up at Common Ground around 10 but didn't stay the entire night -- it was really dead. This was the first time I've had the "pleasure" of going since the students are gone for the summer. We ended up going back to my place and watching Divas Las Vegas which I had taped from VH1 two Thursdays ago. :-) We didn't make it all the way through so I still haven't seen the whole show yet... maybe this week... But that opening number with Anastacia and Celine Dion is pretty great huh? Saturday morning we met up with some friends of mine and walked around the Ithaca Festival. I ran into bunches of folks I haven't seen in a while. After that got tiring, Matt and I left for Syracuse... shopped at Carousel Mall, went to a graduation party/barbeque for one of his friends and then went out to Rain and Trexx for a little fun/dancing. I had a blast at Rain, and a bunch of my friends from Ithaca managed to come up... Rodney, Jacques, Mike, Brad... And then sometime about 1 we all moved over to Trexx. Now, I WAS having a good time at Rain, but I was super tired by 2 am. and I was wearing sandals so it wasn't easy to dance. I'm also not used to going out that late... Matt was convinced I wasn't having a good time 'cause I looked "miserable" (his words) but I finally convinced him I was just tired... and it didn't help that *ahem* one of my friends from Ithaca was so trashed that he was a little... clingy... which gets annoying if you're not as drunk as he is at the time. Anyway, we closed the place down at 4 am. I was soooo happy to see a bed by then. ;-) Yesterday morning we got breakfast at a cute little diner in Syracuse called the "Egg Plant" and then Matt and his roommate Liz brought me back to Ithaca. (Liz is adorable and definitely one of the best new "friends" I made this weekend. Ask her to re-enact any of the Britney Spears skits on SNL, she's a trip!) Back in Ithaca, I ended up taking a nap for most of the afternoon. I felt a little guilty since it was SOOOO nice outside but I couldn't help myself. I got up around 8 and did a load of laundry... At the 'mat, I started reading a new book called "City of Friends" about Gay/Lesbian Communities in the U.S. (I'm only about two chapters into the book but I think it's going to be pretty good. I've had this book sitting on my shelf for over a year now and never picked it up to actually read it. I think I assumed it was going to be more like a text book 'cause it was recommended reading for my "Introduction to Sexual Minorities" class at Cornell. But, I'm pleasantly surprised so far.) The quote of the week has to be Lori describing Keelinn's dance recital to me on the phone. "Shane, you and I NEVER would have been able to behave through the entire show. You would have been laughing hysterically at the sight of all those 2- and 3-year olds tap dancing to a bunch of breeder love songs." I can't wait to see it on tape! P.S. Nine more days 'till my birthday... I'm not sure how I feel about that. | private feedback | (0) public comments |
Hey! I'm Shane... a proud gay progressive Democrat who has recently relocated to New York City from Ithaca, NY. As I am no longer in Ithaca, I haven't quite decided the fate of this blog. Drop me a line!
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